5 years ago...

5 years ago today I lost my mom, my best friend, my inspiration, my rock of which I drew strength. There are so many times even today I wish I could go back and spend a day with you, talking with you, hugging you, loving you. I remember the days when you were so sick and yet you never complained and even then I drew strength from you. How I wish you were here so that I could talk with you, get advice on raising teenagers because you always seemed to know what to do. You of course knew you going to meet your maker and saved us a poem to read when we were feeling lonely.

To Those I Love and Those Who Loved Me

When I am gone, release me, let me go...

I have so many things to see and do,

You musn't tie yourself to me with tears;

Be happy that we had so many years.

I gave to you my love, you can only guess,

How much you gave to me in happiness,

I think you for the love you each have shown,

But now its time I travel alone.

So grieve a while for me, for grieve you must,

Then let your grief be comforted by trust,

It's only for a while that we must part,

So bless the memories within your heart.

I won't be far away, for life goes on;

So if you need me, call and I will come,

Though you can't see me or touch me, I'll be near,

And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear,

All of my love around you soft and clear.

And then, when you must come this way alone,

I'll greet you with a smile and say, "welcome home".

Mom, I think of you especially today but also every day, wondering how you would handle a situation or what you would think. I miss you, I miss our chats, I miss our wonderful relationship. I know you are in heaven and you are whole again and I look forward to the day when I can hug you.

This date of loosing you just happens to fall on our anniversary and I never know how to feel. If I should feel sad for your loss or celebrating another year of marriage. It always comes with mixed emotions for me. You were a wonderful loving person and I was so blessed to be your daughter and even more blessed that God chose you for my mom.